Tis the season for stress – eh?  I’ve had several epiphanies this week but one really stands out the most.  Even though I quit my job and have effectively eradicated 95% of the things that previously caused me stress I’m still stressed.

It’s as if new stressors moved in the second the old one’s moved out.  What does that tell me?  That clearly demonstrates that it’s not the outer world causing the problem…it’s my inner world.

Coming to that realisation must be half the battle –surely!

I am the creator of my stress and in order to change the effect it has over me (strained shoulders, shallow breathing, anxiousness, pimples, reduced immune system, headaches, bad attitude…dare I go on?!) I need to change my perception of what is going on in my life.

Rather than feel nervous about driving to a new location tomorrow, I could perceive the trip as an exciting adventure. Instead of wondering how I’m going to make money I might want to wonder what I’ll spend money on.  In place of worrying about my daughter failing to sleep again tonight (teething) I could go with the flow and if she doesn’t sleep, just deal with it. And as for my sore throat and croaky voice – rather than worry that I’m burning out…I could refuse to feel ill and spend my time thinking about how grateful I am to live in such during such an exciting time in the history of Earth.

We have a choice – don’t we? Or perhaps we don’t?

Let’s look at my driving anxiety more closely…what’s causing me to feel nervous about driving to Hook tomorrow? I know the exact route I need to take. I have sat nav. I know there’s ample parking. So what the heck is causing me to feel anxious? I once got lost near the NEC in Birmingham and cried for hours (it was more like 10 minutes) and since then I think I’ve been afraid that I might get lost.  I wonder if that is the source of my anxiety?

Hmmmmm.

I’ve read 3 books this week all about how to reduce stress and/or change outdated beliefs.  If what the authors say is correct, sub consciously I have an outdated belief about driving to new places that is causing me stress – perhaps my Birmingham incident formed a belief such as, “When I drive to new places I might get lost and if I get lost I get scared and cry”.

So…I need to apply one of the techniques and see if I can change that.

<Let me pause to test out one of my new found belief busting techniques>

Okay…I did two techniques – I did two to hedge my bets.   I rated my anxiety a 4 out of 10. It’s not earth-shattering anxiety…but it’s enough to cause me to feel worrisome.

So – how do I feel now?  Surprisingly, I actually don’t feel anxious at all.  Could this be true?

Let me test this out again on my fear/anxiety that my daughter will once again keep me up all night…My rating is a 7 – it’s been over a week of seriously broken sleep. I’m deprived and it’s making me cranky!  I’m so stressed over the thought of her once again keeping us up all night.

<Pause to do my newly learned stress reduction techniques>

Well, well, well.  I feel lighter, my shoulders don’t feel strained and I can actually say that if my daughter doesn’t sleep then that’s okay.  The emotional charge associated with the future event of sleep deprivation seems to have been removed.  If nothing else, it’s way lower than a 7!

Hmmmmm.

Before I tell you about the techniques I’ve used I’m going to do this for a few more days and determine if it’s really working.

We can all live in hope!