Do you need a bit of inspiration about your work life? Check this out

Posted on September 21, 2011 by Kim

Last week I went to a business club offered off the back of Cranfield University’s Business Growth Programme (of which I’m a proud graduate).

I’ve only been to two meetings but both times I left feeling inspired, supported and excited about the future. The group knows that I’ve decided to leave my companies to figure out how I can follow my heart instead of my head.

It’s interesting as we discuss normal business concepts such as how to get more clients, HR issues, the practicalities of running a business, etc in addition to deep concepts such as:

what is it about running our business that truly makes us happy?
can we encourage more magical moments in our business and personal lives?
how can we make sure we wake up every day with inspiration?

Times are definitely changing in the world of business! It’s not all about making a profit, finding good employees or simply trying to make the Times 100 Best companies list anymore!

It’s much more…it’s about finding a way to love what you do so that the love spreads to everyone you touch.

Anyway – during our business meeting one of the members suggested that we watched the Steve Jobs’ Stanford University commencement speech.

If you haven’t seen this yet, I urge you to take just a few minutes to watch it. I guarantee you’ll feel more inspired about the idea of living the authentic life (or should I put ‘being the real you more often.’)

Have a GREAT DAY! x

Does waking up in the morning need to be a painful experience?

Posted on September 15, 2011 by Kim

If I was an alien I would wonder how humans manage to get out of bed in the morning.

People often cut you down; the world is about to blow up and no matter how hard you try you’ll never look/act in a manner that is accepted by all.

So – why do we get up?

Ultimately we get up because we wouldn’t survive if we lay in bed for days. We need to eat, drink water and so forth. For many people they get up because they must get up – the need to go to work to pay the bills. For others they have to go to school or look after children or whatever…

And yet there are some people that wake up and are excited. They jump out of bed and are eager to get their day started. They have a spark, an enthusiastic manner and a need to see what lies ahead.

I’ve had periods of my life where I jumped out of bed. It was great! But for the most part, I now wake up and think, ‘noooooooooooooooooooooo – not yet!’

Are my thoughts upon waking a realisation that my journey isn’t good enough to spur me out of bed? Actually, when I first wake, I think ‘no – not yet!’ but then within a few minutes I’m happy to get up. That wasn’t always the case – I remember days when I felt ill about getting out of bed. I really hated life so much that it was a battle to pull the covers off. Thankfully, I’m not in that space anymore.

But I do wonder if it’s possible to wake up and think, ‘yes – I’m going to get up and do things that I love to do and I’m going to do them all day!’

Last night I was watching ‘Science on Science’ on the Discovery Channel it there was a segment that started off with a woman singer. The woman was a singer by night and a scientist by day. And not only any scientist – she discovered a way to look for positive genetic code changes. What an amazing person!

And during the interview she explained that she was so lucky to spend each day and night doing what she absolutely loved. I bet she jumps out of bed in the morning!

Yes – my website is all about enjoying the journey…am I asking too much to enjoy waking up also? Of course not!

Is it possible to manually turn your thought process on and off

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Kim

I wonder if it’s possible to manually turn your thought process on and off? I spent the entire weekend not thinking about my businesses because I’ve mentally detached myself from them. Why couldn’t I do that when I was engaged with the companies?

This weekend was rather interesting…My hubby was away and I had my daughter, S, for two full days. You might think that’s no big deal, but I’m the worker in our household. I’m use to waking S up, giving her food and then going off to work to support the family.

Staying home alone with a 15 month old for two whole days is hard freakin’ work! I seriously don’t know how single mums or dads do it.

Right…It’s not the first time that I’ve looked after S for a couple days, however it’s the first time that I was fully present while looking after. There’s a big difference between thinking about work while playing with a child and simply playing with a child for the sake of playing!

I can’t help but think, ‘what the heck have I been doing all these years?’ My thoughts have been so far removed from my live life. What I mean is that I’ve been going through the motions of looking after S (amongst other things) but not being present.

What a tragic mistake! All I can say is thankfully I’ve discovered my wrong thinking now and not when I’m 80.

Anyway, now that I’ve made the clear decision to leave my companies I don’t have the constant thoughts flooding my head. I don’t have to worry about an employee that I need to dismiss or a boring drawn out management meeting or having to come up with some sort of strategy to get buy-in over something.

So…throughout the weekend I kept feeling this odd sensation – it’s as if my brain was telling me, ‘Kim…you should be thinking about the businesses…oh yeah – you don’t need to think about them. Carry on enjoying what you are doing.’

It’s like entering summer break after leaving university. You have this overwhelming urge to get your homework done and then you realise that there is no more homework.

Fortunately, I was able to be present and blow bubbles (and help pop them), read ‘The Ladybird that never said a word,’ (8 times), squeeze myself into an indoor kiddie playground (with S and 15 other toddlers), have a water war in the tub (I won), and see who would win a very important race – Thomas The Tank Engine vs The Bus (Thomas won).

Additionally, for the first time in 14 years I went to lunch with my father-in-law. We had a great time – surprise, surprise!

What the heck is going on? I feel like I’m in some sort of matrix type thing where I took the red pill rather than the blue pill. It’s like I’ve woken up from a bad dream to find that life and the journey is incredible…but it’s only incredible if you brain & heart are at the same place at the same time.

So, I’ll ask the question again, is it possible to manually turn your thought process on and off? Going forward, how can I ensure I don’t get caught up in work so much that I miss the present?

An unexpected laugh-fest at 5am taught me some lessons about life

Posted on August 6, 2011 by Kim

Lately I’ve focused quite a bit about enjoying my new work-related journey rather than my family, social, educational, spiritual, etc journeys. As I’ve written before I believe that the journey need not be segmented into separate groups – I need to uncover ways to enjoy all aspects of my life.

I suppose that I’ve had the largest change with my work situation and therefore it’s been my highest concern.

Saying that, I had two magical moments last night that had nothing to do with work – one was around 9:15pm and the other was at 4:55am. I’m sure you’re wondering what kind of crazy night I had to keep me up so late. Well…It’s not that kind of story.

My 15 month old daughter just started to go to nursery on Monday’s and Fridays. The transition has been difficult for her as she seems to get overtired and finds it difficult to get herself off to dreamland.

Between 8 and 9:30 last night I had to hold S on my chest as I rocked in the rocker. I was tired and would have been asleep myself if it wasn’t for S not being able to settle. My mind raced a bit and I kept thinking, ‘I just want to sleep! God help me!’ And then I decided to see if I could choose to enjoy the moment.

After a few seconds I realised that there will come a time where my daughter will not be able to lay on my chest. There will come a time where she won’t want or need my comforting. One day she’ll be all grown up and my heart will yearn for the closeness that I was currently sharing with her at that very moment.

I almost missed a magical moment because my brain was telling me ‘I’m too tired!’

So…I sat in the dark, with S on my chest nuzzling in with her bunny in one hand and the other around my neck. I feel so elated…so warm…so in love with S and with life in general.

And as I sat in awe, S sat up and decided she wanted to give me a kiss. She just started giving kisses this past week. She gave me about 5 kisses and then I gave her a Eskimo kiss (rubbing noses) and she laughed and laughed and laughed. And then I laughed. At 9:15 S and I were in hysterics enjoying one of the most remarkable moments of my life.

S finally fell asleep after our laugh-fest. Then around 4am she started crying. I’m sure that she’s also teething. I wasn’t happy about the early wake-up call, but what can you do?

I picked up S, cuddled her for an hour and still couldn’t get her to settle. My husband is away so I thought I’ll just bring her into our bed and see if she’ll get to sleep with me. I’m nervous about doing things like that as I don’t want S coming to bed with us to become a habit.

Anyway, I laid her down next to me and we faced each other. She giggled and then I giggled and the laugh-fest started once again! I couldn’t believe that at 5am in the morning I would be capable of laughing. That’s just nuts.

So…I suppose there’s lots to draw from my two magical moments last night. The first is that I was able to override my thoughts about being tired and just make a choice to enjoy the moment. The other thing I learned is that I need to be more open and accept that life doesn’t have to be the way I think it is. Until today I would have never predicted that I would wake-up (against my will) and enjoy a laugh-fest at the crack of dawn.

So – how’s your journey going?

An experience of finding fulfilment by skipping out on work early…

Posted on August 3, 2011 by Kim

Okay – thus far today’s journey has been good. I had my coffee shop ‘me-time,’ wrote my blog entry, worked on my website (signed up to the amazon affiliate program) and systematically ticked off everything on my ‘to-do’ list.

So – what’s my issue? Well…what do I do now? I can feel tension moving in on my so-far-so-good day. I’m sat at my computer trying to put in my full 9-5 day but there’s nothing left that I feel like doing.

Dare I pack up and take a walk (it’s 3pm)? Oh-my-gosh… It feels exciting to think about it.

Going from an 80 hours/week workaholic to just going with the flow (with no work focus) is really strange. You can see that I’m totally conditioned to put in my hard day’s work or at least fill my day with being busy. But I know that a hard day’s work doesn’t tick all my boxes (money, fulfilment, excitement, fun, growth, and so on).

So, should I just do what my heart is telling me? Actually, now that I’m paying attention, it’s my stomach that has a kind of giddy feeling. It’s as if I have butterflies in my tummy. How silly do I sound?

Right – I’m going to give this a try. I’ll let you know how it goes.

[The next day - today]

I stopped working at 3pm yesterday and went for a walk ending up next to a beautiful old church. There was a large monument that I sat down on to read a magazine. Everything around me seemed so crisp and filled with deep colours. It’s as if I hadn’t noticed greenery for ages.

I heard the birds chirping, felt the air on my arms and tasted fresh cut hay in the air. I was really aware of my surroundings. I then read my magazine and become so absorbed in reading that I forgot where I was only to look up and be reminded of the amazing scenery around me.

My decision to leave early was well worth it – because I forced myself out of my day-to-day routine I felt more alive and more present. I’m sure if I do it every day the impact will be reduced but I think there’s something to be said about following your heart/feelings AND doing things that are different from your normal routine.

Had I stayed at my desk I would have missed a very pleasant experience. And if I chose to go clothes shopping rather than sitting at the church I’m sure I wouldn’t have become so aware. I’m starting to like this whole idea of following what feels good and right.

I can categorically report that yesterday was a good journey. Wooowoooowo!

How to make the journey of life worth travelling – I think?

Posted on July 25, 2011 by Kim

Right – where do I start?

Okay, it’s been seven years since I started my first company. And six years since my second. For the first few years I didn’t take a salary and invested all profits earned back into the companies. By year four I was able to get a modest salary dreaming of the day where I could pay off my debts and be financially free. And in year six, my dreams of a six figure income (and handsome dividend pay-outs) finally came to fruition.

At first it was wonderful to feel the freedom of having money. I paid off my student loan, credit cards and purchased a car with cash. I went shopping and knew that I could buy anything I wanted.

For a few months it was great. And then something strange happened.

After buying new clothes, shoes, the car, a few amazing holidays and even a super-duper-top-notch hot tub it dawned on me that the game was over. I had won the money game. Just like the feeling you get when you win a video game, I had the quick shot of excitement followed by sense of deflation. I went into stores and realised that although I could buy anything in the store, I didn’t really have the desire to purchase stuff anymore.

It freaked me out. For as long as I can remember I just wanted to have money. If I had money, all problems would be solved. Life would be perfect.

Well…after winning the money game, my life wasn’t perfect. My life now had a hole – a big fat hole. What do I think about now? Why do I get out of bed? What is my purpose? If the meaning of life isn’t to get rich, than what is it?

To make matters worse, I spent year after year doing things that I didn’t necessarily enjoy. So – the journey wasn’t that great and the destination wasn’t worth my travels. Amazing – eh?

I am being a bit cynical. Over the years I have had some great times – I’ve learned loads, have met some of the most amazing people in the world and I have thousands of incredible memories. I just wish that I knew what I know now then. I could have made my journey much better.

So, this is what I’ve decided to do to make my current journey worth travelling…

1. Figure what my purpose in life is as it’s clearly not all about having a 6-figure income. I have a feeling it’s more about giving, growing, having fun, being authentic, living for today…

2. Take a giant leap and somehow remove myself from the running of my companies (massive yikes – how will I make money? What will I do?)

3. Follow my heart about everything – future businesses, friends, family, social events, me-time. Rather than doing things automatically, to stop and think/feel if it’s right first.

4. Make myself spend time every day figuring out how I can enjoy the journey; hence this blog.

Yes I’m scared! I have no idea what I’m going to do or how I’m going to do it. Watch this space!

Living with purpose and enjoying the journey (an experiment to choosing a different path)

Posted on July 24, 2011 by Kim

“Many of us postpone our dreams, reaching mid-life only to realise we have spent too much time concentrating on how and what we have been dong, while neglecting to question why we have been doing it.” Think of an Elephant, Paul Bailey

Looking back at my personal hand-written journal I found several entries where I indicated ‘why’ I wanted to start and run a company. To summarise them, the three main points are below. It was interesting to see that the prioritisation of them changed throughout the years…Number 3 was my number one priority in 2004 (when I first started a company); however that is now last on the list.

1. To express my creative energy by creating strategies, writing, educating, helping people to learn and grow. To wake up and feel good about the fact that I am, in some way, helping those around me to have a better life. This may be in the way of saving them money, educating them, listening, supporting them or simply showing I care. And when I say ‘people’ I mean, co-workers, people who read my publications, service providers, the check-out girl at the shop, any person I come in contact with…

2. To create a company where people felt connected, loved, a part of something special. Where they felt safe to express themselves and to grow. To prove to the world that you can create a company where everyone feels special, loved and able to be the best they can be. To work as a team to make something bigger than the sum of it’s parts. To laugh, to cry, to share, to care… To have a family that is supportive and wants to work together to make the world better.

3. To earn a monthly cash-flow that allows me (and hubby) to live comfortably and to grow our assets so that we will one day have financial security for us, our families and our friends in need.

Looking over this list, I’m saddened to say that I’ve fallen into the trap of concentrating on ‘how’ and ‘what’ rather than ‘why’. When I get up every morning, I think about ‘how’ I’m going to make it throughout the day without having a mental breakdown. I think about ‘what’ I need to do to hide the fact that I am putting on one big act. I’ve managed to get myself into a position where I’m not the person I really am. I’m so stressed and frustrated that I’m not the Kim that I know I really am. I’m a Kim that wants to hide away and avoid others seeing the worst I have to offer.

You can call me idealistic and naïve to have such ‘why’s’? But I don’t care. I’d rather work and die trying to live to those why’s (the three listed above) rather than accepting that this world is a crap place, work is hard and something to be endured and that ‘frustration’ is the way it has to be.

I always told myself that if I have to die trying, I will always seek the truth. The truth that I believe exists. I will always try to find the formula to loving rather than hating…to connection rather than separation.

Saying all this, I know I have choice…and I know that I can choose to react to situations differently, I can choose to remove myself from situations and I can choose to try (or suggest) a different path.

When I break down my main concerns, they all revolve around the fact that I am not working towards or achieving my three ‘why’s’.

The first is expressing my creative energy. Rather than write, create and work on ways to bring benefits to others (readers, employees, clients) I’m bogged down and frustrated in work that doesn’t interest me at all. I feel that I have no time to focus on anything and I’m constantly fighting to get a return for the hard work invested.

The second is owning/working at an organisation that doesn’t really operate on my core values. This is due to several factors that I won’t go into now. But because of how things have evolved, my leading skills only show frustration and anger…I have become a very poor leader indeed. I’m afraid to go to work…I’m afraid that I’ve become someone that tells people to do stuff rather than empowers them to want to do stuff. I’m afraid that I’ve become someone that really doesn’t care because I can’t find the time to care. This isn’t me.

The third revolves around financial security. Provided I can endure future years of stress and frustrations I do believe that there will be a substantial financial gain…but at what price? I’d rather make little money and have my health. (Actually – I’d rather make lots of money, have my health and totally enjoy life!)

My current state is not good. And it really doesn’t have to be this way. I can choose another way…But then I ask myself, am I only falling prey to the ‘grass is greener’ syndrome. Or the, ‘Things will be better if XYZ happen…’

I believe that if you’re not happy now, you’re not going to be happy later. However, I also believe that we make our reality…and I’ve gone way off course and rather than thinking about my ‘why’s’ all I’ve done is thought about ‘how’ and ‘what’.

Now that I’ve revisited why I want to get up every morning I feel as if I have many choices. It’s as if I fell of my path and didn’t know I was off-roading…and now I’m prepared to get back on the path.

So, this is my first post on my way to waking up and feeling good. It’s time for me to become accountable and choose the path that I really want to live. (Yikes).

To read my story, go here.

Enjoying The Journey

To demonstrate that it’s possible to make your journey through life more enjoyable

Tag Archives: enjoying life