My life changing decision to leave the ‘rat race’ and change myself from a stressed-out control freak into a peaceful, joyous being is working.  In fact, it’s working so well that I’m gobsmacked by it all.

Just last week I went on holiday to Jamaica with my hubby and 23 month daughter.  Prior to the trip I spent quite a bit of time visualising and feeling how I wanted the trip to go. I wrote in my journal a full page about the ease of the journey, the taste of the excellent foods, the warmth of the sun, meeting new friends, excellent service and on and on. When contemplating the trip I felt love and gratitude for having the opportunity to have such a wonderful vacation…I felt how I wanted to feel and was thankful for the trip before it even happened.

Well…to my delight the vacation was a totally new experience for me. Normally, the pre-plane trip (my mind speculating) is very stressful:

-          What if I have to use the bathroom and the seatbelt sign comes on?

-          What if my daughter won’t sit in her seat or cries too much?

-          What if there’s lots of turbulence?

-          What if we crash?

-          (This list could go on for a long time…)

And that’s just the plane trip – as for the holiday, my normal ‘what if’s’ went along the line of:

-          What if I get board?

-          What am I going to do for 10 days if I’m not working?

-          What if the food sucks?

Now I’m quite an upbeat positive person and on a conscious level I would have thoughts of excitement coupled with worries.  In all my past trips, the plane ride is usually okay – I haven’t crashed yet…but every time I need to use the bathroom the darn seatbelt light comes on!  And as for the actual holiday, I usually want to go home after 3 days!

For this trip, however, things were totally different.  I spent time before going really getting myself into how I wanted to feel on the trip.  I didn’t visualise every outcome…I just kept thinking about how happy I was and how great the service was…and how nice it was to meet new friends.  And regarding the plane trip, I just visualised getting off the plane and thinking, ‘wow – that was an excellent journey.’

The results?!?!?

Well – we purchased two tickets for economy plus (my daughter is too young for a seat) and we were upgraded to business class and given 3 seats!  In business class we had fully reclined beds!  For a 10 hour flight I cannot tell you what a difference it makes to have a bed.  I darn near died with happiness/gratefulness when I discovered it wasn’t a mistake – the seats really were for us! And surprise, surprise…the seatbelt light never came on.  Needless to say, it was the best plane journey I’ve ever experienced in my life.

As for the holiday – it was exceptional. For ten days I did very little yet I was fine with that.  I didn’t get stressed out feeling that I had to be doing something.  I got up, ate breakfast, went swimming, ate lunch, did my meditation, ate dinner, had a glass of wine, mingled with people, enjoyed my hubby and daughter and that was that. No checking my phone or emails, no need to read 10 books, no desire to create a business plan…

Based on my previous vacation experiences it was totally different.  For the first time in my life I actually had a ‘normal’ vacation!  I did what I was supposed to do – I chilled out and simply enjoyed just being.

The strange thing is that I didn’t realise how monumental the change was until I was telling my therapy woman about it. I think it’s important to realise that when we work on ourselves, it’s often difficult to see that we are advancing…that we are getting closer to the higher version of ourselves that we’re aspiring to be.

So…my messages for today are these:

• If you work on yourself you can change the way your life is.  You can make it better, more fulfilling, more full of love and joy.  I say this because if I can do it, so can you.
• It’s helpful to find someone that you can talk to on a weekly basis that helps you to realize you’re making progress.  I’ve discovered that when I discuss my self-help/spiritual growth with someone who understands who I am and where I’ve come from I seem to learn much more about myself.  There’s something about voicing our journey that allows quite a bit of truth to come out – and that truth won’t become apparent if you don’t share it with someone.

Big love,

Kim